"Just Asking"

"Ladies, now I know that you may not agree but I ask you to just listen. Woman to woman, we all have "complained or are still talking negative about men whether it is our father, sons or spouses on a daily. Let me ask you (honestly) is it them or is it our own expectations that is the problem (men you can comment too). Now with our fathers we have to accepted that they are who they are and deal accordingly, our sons are the product of our own doing depending on how we raised them and the outside influences we let into their lives but our spouses now that is based on our choices and if we set any criteria for what we wanted in a man.

Now ladies, let's have a straight talk, do you give your man the treatment that you would like to receive or do you just complain about what he doesn't do. When you wake up in the morning, do you greet him with a smile, say good morning and give him an appreciative pat on the butt or do you start the morning with a list of demands or complaints. Now I know the first thing you are thinking is he doesn't do that for me but have you thought if you do it (sincerely) you may change the way you start your day and maybe he will feel the same.  Ladies, this is not about changing your man this is about taking positive actions to get positive results. If you want your relationship to change, improve or be more positive you first must make a change in yourself. Give the treatment that you want to receive, if you want your man to cook for you and his reason is he can not cook, then invite him into the kitchen and make him apart of the cooking process Make it a fun event, play a little, make it something he would like to do. If he does something wrong don't criticize, compliment his effort, make him feel comfortable and appreciate his willingness to learn. I know we have long days at work or taking care of the children and sometimes just don't feel like dealing with our spouses needs, remember not to take your exhaustion out on your children or spouse. Take a moment settle the children, and greet your spouse with the love you feel for him, relax him then take a moment for yourself.  If you have something on your mind wait until all is settle before attacking him with a problem, try to communicate in a calm peaceful state of mind so that you can discuss solutions and avoid arguments. Men this also goes for you too, instead of communicating your concern do you look for a distraction or run to the door. Try to have more understanding for one another, place yourself in the other person's shoes and see how they would feel by your words or actions.

If you want a great relationship then change the only thing you can change and that is yourself. I know when you first meet you don't learn everything you need to know about the person before you start a relationship, sometimes it is just physical and you get caught up then children are involved.  Although, the relationship may have started out on shallow desires, only means that for the relationship to grow it will take honest communication, hard work learning to like and accept ourselves as well as one another, openly encouraging as well as appreciating each other a relationship is like a business in order for it to be successful you have to work hard and as a team.

There are too many broken homes, fatherless and motherless children, we are losing generations because of our lack of willingness to make the relationships we enter work or jump into a relationship before we are ready and jump ship when things may not be the we want it to be. This is not including abusive, life threatening or unhealthy relationship those I advice any woman or man to jump ASAP! But those with money issues, stress, culture differences any relationship that compromises can be made you must continue to try. God wants you to be together, he blesses love and marriage, he will help you find the answer.

Now ladies, I know this may seem like it is all on us to keep things going but in truth it is, now before you bite my head off.  God gave us the greatest gift by blessing us with the ability to bring life, and the greatest job in the world to a Mother, we are the first women our son's love and the first women our daughter learn from.  We are the mothers of society, he gave man physical strength, he gave us spiritual strength, we are the backbone of the family and able to rise after each fall as well as pick up our spouse and children when times are hard. So if your spirit or relationship is broken go to God and he can repair it but don't take the job God gave you lightly, your career, your bank account, your car or how big your house is not what God is going to look at when your time comes, how much you give, love and taught will.

Tell me your thoughts and opinion, I am looking for positive objective comments. Please!