5 Ways To Boost Your Self Esteem

While for many, self-esteem issues are a transitional part of growing into an adult and finding a place in the world, scientific research studies show that people with continued low self-esteem are also more likely to suffer from depression, anxiety, poor physical health, and even a lower income later on in life. 

Those with long lasting issues of low self-esteem know only too well that it is not something you grow out of, but something that sits in the subconscious mind and continues to effect every part of life for years. How then can we enhance self esteem. 

Here are five ways that you can do just that. 

1. Model Confident People  

Noticing what confident people do, how they speak, the ways they behave, can provide vital clues to finding self-esteem inside yourself. Who is the most confident person you can think of? When you have them firmly in your mind, ask yourself these questions: how do they hold their shoulders? How do they stand? How do they walk? What clothes do they wear? How do they behave when with other people? What sort of things do you imagine they say about themselves? And if they were in your situation, what would they do? 

This questioning goes far beyond "fake it till you make it" - it links us into the answers already inside us. Once you have a list of what that confident person would do, go ahead and model this behaviour. Try it on for a few hours, a day, even a few days. Notice how everything you do, and the events around you, begin to change on their own.  

2. Advertise Yourself 

When you have to convince someone else about your strengths, it can have a fantastic effect on your self-esteem. Sitting down and really thinking about all your skills, gifts and talents is a wonderful reminder of all the good things about being you. Try writing an advertisement selling yourself as the perfect partner, house mate, friend, etc, with a full description of why anyone would be lucky to have you around. Don't be afraid to blow your own trumpet. This isn't an exercise in modesty, but in self-esteem. 

3. Work On Your Resume 

Resumes are all about convincing someone to hire your time and your expertise. Giving your resume a regular update can also give your self-esteem a great boost. Alternatively, update your Facebook profile. Strange as it sounds, there is now research from Cornell University in New York to prove that people who view their Facebook profiles more regularly have better self-esteem. You get to go back and view your clever status updates, your significant dates and events, and photos of good times.  

4. Say Positive Things About Yourself  

Saying positive things about yourself, to yourself or others, is important. What we say about ourselves reveals a lot about our level of self-esteem. When we rehearse only what we do wrong, or don't like about ourselves, our brain builds neural pathways for these conversations, till eventually negative self-talk is practically automatic. 

If you are not used to talking about yourself in a positive way, you will simply have to learn how. Keep practicing, choose a few nice things to say or think about yourself and use them as a mantra every day. It can be something you are proud of about yourself, or positive things you remember others saying about you in the past. 

The more you repeat this, the easier the behaviour will become as your nervous system will build more neural connections to this positive self-talk, and less to the negative self-talk.  

5. Is It You, Or Is It Them? 

The people who surround us, at home, at school, at work, or in social settings, can have a huge impact on our self-esteem. Either they will support us, making us feel better about ourselves, or their negativity will bring us down emotionally. This may not be intentional. Some people just seem to notice what's wrong more than on what's right. 

If you find there are people in your life who make you feel bad about yourself, you need to make a decision. Can you counteract the effect they are having with you? Or do you need to do some prunning? 

Do you really need to be around people who make you feel bad about yourself? Choose to associate with positive people that make you feel alive, happy, and optimistic about life.  

Deciding to spend less time with people isn't about making anyone else 'wrong' or 'bad' -- it has to do with making clear decisions about how you want to feel, and asserting your right to feel good instead of bad.

Use these strategies on a regular basis and you really will boost your self-esteem -- and increase your self-confidence.

Use These 4 Tips To Increase Your Self Esteem

Most people need a little self-esteem boost every once in a while. 

Self-esteem is all about how we feel inside. 

When our self esteem is low, we can find ourselves living with anxiety, we can find ourselves in abusive relationships, and be prevented from reaching our true potential.  

There may also be cons to self-esteem. For instance, when a person's sense of self worth is unrealistically high, it can turn into arrogance or what is known as 'narcissism', and this can cause problems. 

Such individuals can find it difficult to accept and learn from their own mistakes and may develop a false sense of entitlement. 

Developing a healthy level of self-esteem is very important. For some people, a healthy, high self-esteem comes naturally. But for others, developing a healthy self-esteem takes more effort. 

Check out these pointers to give your self-esteem a kick start. 

1. Draw up a list of your best points - For some individuals with diminished self-esteem, even considering making a list of their good qualities seems like a gigantic task, but it can be extremely helpful for boosting self-esteem. If you find this task challenging, consider what others say about you. What compliments have you ever been given? Start with those and then work from there. Jot your good qualities down using "I" and the present tense. For example, "I am a thoughtful and considerate person." 

2. Regular affirmations - Take another look at the list you made. Choose your favorite qualities to use to do daily affirmations. Take those statements and write them down on note cards and sticky notes. Put the sticky notes where you will notice them everyday, such as on your computer monitor, bathroom mirror, or refrigerator. When you see them, take a few moments to repeat them over to yourself. Put note cards in your pocket or wallet where you are sure to come across them at least once a day. When you do, take a moment to read them to yourself a few times. In just a little while you can change out some of your best qualities for some of the other qualities on your list. 

3. Gain some perspective - People often don't talk about their challenges, disappointments, and struggles in life, but that's not because they don't have them. How we decide to tackle these things will directly influence levels of self-esteem, joy and success. The really successful and confident people in life aren't those who have encountered few difficulties and challenges, they are people who have viewed them as just a part of life and have pushed ahead anyway, learning as they go. Your failures don't mean that you are a failure, they just mean you need to reassess the situation and the way you approach it and tackle it from a different angle. 

4. Make yourself the priority - Part of boosting your self esteem is accepting you are deserving of your own love. Make time for yourself. Take care of yourself when you're encountering a trying time. Say 'no' when you have to and don't feel bad about it. Make your needs clear to others and ask for what you need. (If you find it difficult to say 'no', then look for some assertiveness training, or check out a book on the subject.)

Use these 4 simple tips and you will increase your self-esteem. Above all, make sure you are kind to yourself and give yourself just as much love as you give to the important people in your life. You truly do deserve it!

How Do You Boost Your Kids' Self-Esteem?

Unfortunately, lots of kids and teenagers fall victim to low self-esteem. But did you know YOU play a huge role in how they view themselves? Even though they don't like to admit it, most of the opinions kids have about themselves comes from what their parents do and say!

Just how important is a healthy dose of self-esteem?

With it, kids can grow, develop, and learn better. In fact, self-esteem will give your kids the power to:

- Make friends and interact with people their own age.

- Successfully handle the ups AND downs of life.

- Be independent.

- Be responsible.

- Take pride in their accomplishments.

- Work towards solutions, instead of just drowning in problems.

- Have plenty of energy.

However, kids that don't have a whole lot of self-esteem suffer in every facet of their lives. If they don't feel good about themselves, your kids may not ever try anything new. In fact, they'll probably act like they don't care about anything! They'll have trouble making friends (or make friends with the wrong people!) and will be easily influenced (something that can be especially dangerous if they're hanging out with the wrong crowd!). They may not say it, but they'll probably also feel completely unloved.

So, how can you make sure your kids have all the self-esteem they need?

You've got to start by watching your kids closely. Since kid and teenage emotions can literally change from hour to hour, you need to be on the lookout for any changes - even minor ones. A backhanded comment from a fellow student on the school bus can be enough to send your child's self-esteem reeling. If you don't build them back up when they get home, the problem is likely to snowball.

You also need to work hard to combat the irrational. After all, kids are like little sponges. If they hear something often enough - even if it's totally irrational - they'll eventually accept it as fact. If, for example, the school bully keeps telling your child that he's stupid, he'll wind up believing it. It's up to you to make sure that these irrational thoughts stay far, far away!

But that's not all it takes. You also need to: 

1. Pick your own words carefully.

Your comments can literally make or break your kids' self-esteem. So, make sure your reactions are the right ones! For example, if your child failed a test - but studied really hard for it beforehand - tell them how proud you are of their hard work. Even though they didn't do as well as they would've liked, they put in a huge effort and that should be commended.

2. Consider yourself a role model.

Like it or not, the way you act will determine how your kids act. For example, if you're always criticizing yourself, your kids will, too - meaning they'll beat down their own self-esteem just like you do! If you have a problem with your own self-esteem, your kids will be likely to develop it, too. So, work on your self-esteem first. That way, you'll all feel great! (And as an added benefit, you can share some of your self-esteem boosting tips with them!)

3. Make sure they understand no one is perfect.

Everyone makes mistakes and it's important for your kids to learn that. So, if it takes them awhile to learn long division, it doesn't mean they're failures. Make sure they understand it may take awhile to learn new things and it's OK if it does.

4. Be respectful.

Even though they're small, your kids need your full respect. When you make a decision, explain the thought behind it. Whatever you do, don't make fun of them!

5. Let your kids know you love them.

Isn't this what parenting is all about?! Make sure your kids know that they're loved and appreciated. Just be genuine. After all, kids can tell when you're not being sincere!

Stop Criticizing Yourself

Has someone has ever caused you emotional pain with careless, mean or sarcastic remarks? What follows are some practical ideas to avoid that sort of pain in the future, and to also make sure that someone is not your own self.

Criticism can be a positive force at times. We must be able to handle it if we are to learn new skills. Without some form of feedback it would be hard to improve our performance or behavior.


But criticism also has the potential to inflict pain. It can cut very deep and even stay with us for our lifetime. Depending on how well you handle it, criticism has the potential to put serious limits on your life, or to take you forward into higher levels of personal performance.

The secret is how you handle the criticism you receive. The best response to criticism is to separate the facts from the opinions of others. A fact is something that is somehow provable and can be shown to be true. An opinion is an idea, or someone's personal interpretation of something.



Take your dog, for example. If you were to think, that's a beautiful dog, it would be an opinion. The underlying fact it that it is a dog you are referring. Your neighbor might think your dog is ordinary looking or even ugly. One thought - it is a dog - is an objective fact. The other thought - it is a beautiful dog - is a subjective opinion.

There are periods in our lives when other peoples' opinions of us seem more important than our own opinion. This especially occurs during our sensitive teenage years. When we are beginning to take our place as a young man or woman, the opinions of our peer's often have a huge impact.

Actually that is a natural part of becoming socialized. But we need to correct this as we become adults. Sooner or later we have to make a serious decision to have our own opinion of ourselves be the most important opinion.

A good skill to develop is the ability to choose your frame of reference. A frame of reference is the criteria by which we judge something to determine if it is valid.

There are two possible frames of reference: internal and external. Suppose you have completed a task at work. How do you know you have done it well? Does your direct supervisor tell you have done a great job, or do you just know without anyone saying so? The first frame of reference is external, and the second is internal.



Actually neither frame of reference is better than the other, and both have their own importance. When learning something new, having an external frame of reference may be useful. It can otherwise be difficult to reach beyond what we already know.



An internal frame of reference, on the other hand, has you deciding what is good, bad, or otherwise. If you use a personal feeling to judge yourself, you are using an internal frame of reference.



Deal positively with opinions. When you are thinking about yourself and how you are regarded, it is beneficial to create some solid, positive internal frames of reference.



People with strong self-esteem operate from a positive internal frame of reference regarding their personal worth. People with less self-esteem operate from an external frame of reference, and are more likely to accept other people's opinions of them. This is does not lead to a positive life experience.



Correct your own negative self-talk by focusing on what you what you do well. Be a little kinder and forgiving of yourself, and stop re-creating past painful judgments by bringing them into the present moment. The interesting to note is that this actually creates positive changes in your brain.

Do Some Job Interview Practice To Make Sure You Get That Job

The key to securing any job is selling yourself in the interview process. The interview is the prospective employer's first and usually only impression of the job applicant prior to an offer of a job being made. Anyone can have a second party proofread their application or resume but when it comes to the interview the applicant is all on their own. One of the best ways to prepare for a job interview is to take part in some job interview practice.



Job interview practice can help ease nervousness and tension when the time of the actual interview arrives. Preparing for difficult questions, making sure to be dressed for success and having a self assured confidence can set a job applicant apart from applicants who go into an interview "cold turkey". It is quite apparent to practiced interviewers whether someone has bothered to do any preperation or not.



It's always a good idea to get a second or even third opinion of things. Job interview practice can help the applicant get a better idea of how they come across in an interview situation, from the quality of their responses to the impression they create in their appearance. The applicant may not see the small details that an interviewer may pick up on and take into account when assessing the suitability of the candidate, so it's best if it is something that can be pointed out before the day of the interview and improved on if necessary. 


Practicing answers such as' What do you feel you can contribute to this company' or 'what would you say your greatest weakness is' can help the applicant come across as confident and self assured. If the applicant has thought out the answers to questions such as these, the answer can be given in a self assured manner without hesitation. The mock interviewer may be able to introduce questions that the candidate has never even thought about preparing for. Being prepared is the best way to prepare for an actual job interview and the best way to do that is with job interview practice



So to reiterate, a job applicant's best chance of securing the position is to give a great interview. A great interview involves being prepared, confident and being dressed for success. It is a statistical fact that those who prepare for a job interview by getting some job interview practice have more success than those who don't. It truly can make the difference between being offered the position or not.