Wednesday, August 6, 2014

How to Love Your Life More

How much do you love your life? 


This may be the very first time you have been asked this kind of question, but you should really be asking yourself this every day. Our decisions and choices create the life that we inhabit. It is possible, if you aren't paying attention to where it is all headed, that you may end up in some places you never really intended to go. While you can find no quick fixes, there are a few actions you can take to start your journey of getting back on track to loving your life.



1. Prioritize


In order to love our lives we should be spending a lot of our time and energy on aspects that mean the most to us. Yet often, we make decisions and say "yes" to incidentals that take away our time together with our energy. 


For you to move forward, it may be well to commence by considering what the top 3 priorities in your life actually are. If you answer family, creativity, and adventure, for instance then it could be difficult to love a life where you are doing little more than boring, repetitive tasks, and losing out on important time with your family. Consider whether your life, your career, your home, actually represent you and those things you hold dear?


Get your diary out and be in charge of your schedule. 


Bring what you enjoy into what you do. If you love cooking and you work in an office, bring home-made snacks to work for your colleagues to enjoy. For those who are lacking family time, check if you can manage to free more non-negotiable time to spend with your children and spouse every week. Start with small beginnings. Spend an extra hour every now and then on those things that are important to you. Make your time work for you. 


2. Manage Expectations


So often people make themselves sick with misery because their lives are just not meeting their expectations. Maybe your companion isn't the fairy tale soul mate you always fantasized about. Perhaps your job isn't the career that you envisioned when you were studying. It could be that you are living day to day at an age when you thought you could be financially more independent.


There is no need to reduce your expectations of a happy, full life. But in these situations it's wise to sit down and figure out whether unhappiness is the consequence of a situation that isn't helping you, or if you are comparing your life with an illusion. Accepting people, jobs and life for what they are right now can be a healing experience for many. Your partner, husband or wife may not be the perfect soul mate you dreamed about - but comparing them to someone else will only make you both miserable. 


3. Count What's There - Not What's Missing


Remind yourself about everything that is good in your life. What does your partner do better than anyone else? What does your job provide you that you've stayed on this long? What prompted you to choose this job in the first instance? Some of the best things in life are not the strategies that come to fruition, but the surprises that the process brings with it.


4. Take Time Out


Even if your life is fantastic, each of us needs a break once in a while. You may have a career you love or have a great family, but too much of a good thing can be bad for you. Fatigue sets in, you begin to feel depleted, resentful, and wonder about changing your circumstances. Maybe nothing is wrong with your situation - you just need to stand back and take a breather. 


Research shows that people gain more benefit before their holiday than during or after the holiday. This has led scientists to suggest that anticipation of a holiday can be as important as the holiday itself. Plan and schedule regular vacations, spread out your annual leave to some shorter holidays distributed throughout the year, and get regular mini-breaks such as a night out with friends, weekend camping trips to get a change of scenery, and taking time to just be by yourself and do absolutely nothing at all. 


Time spent alone is important for mental and emotional well-being. Take more control over your daily schedule and arrange for regular alone time. Take yourself on a date to a book shop, do the gardening, go for a run, or embark on an adventure.


5. Find Your Passion


Experiencing passion is an important part of living a contented and meaningful life. Inject passion into every day, even weekdays as you work and don't feel particularly passionate. If you search hard enough, you will always find some aspect to ignite your passion. 


When passion is lacking, it can be re-ignited by your favorite food, taking a course, or a night out with friends. Passion can derive from anywhere - it can be reading, creativity, saving animals, playing sports, your friends, or visiting distant countries. Passion can come from something quite modest, such as drinking a coffee. There is no right or wrong. Notice that evoke true excitement from deep inside you, and also notice what kind of person inspires you.


What famous or notable person do you most wish you could be like? This might be the first step in realizing how to live the life you love. If you really aren't sure what your passions are, start with a fresh slate and learn something you've never tried before. 


Take a course in something you're interested in learning; visit a new town; try some exotic dishes; start meeting new people, or check online and start following blogs on any subjects that interest you. Many of the world's finest chefs, writers, artists, designers, architects, athletes, innovators and entrepreneurs blog regularly about their thoughts, ideas and advice.


6. Learn to Love Yourself 


Discovering a life you love is only possible if you can love yourself. This does not mean arrogance or denying that you've got faults. Loving yourself focuses on being your own best friend, a person who accepts you on both good days, and bad days when things don't go to plan. 


Acknowledge and accept your flaws and shortcomings, but resolve to look after yourself well. You deserve to be loved and treated well, not only by yourself but also by others. You deserve a decent life that makes you happy. Not because you are perfect, but even though you are flawed and human, and even though you may find it difficult at times, you still deserve to be treated with kindness and compassion. 


This isn't always easy. We don't necessarily learn to be good to ourselves while growing up. It is a skill that grows with time, and will continue to grow stronger provided we work at it. And the greater amount of love we give to our self, the less we will have to run around fixing problems or finding solutions. Loving your life can become a habit. 


Most importantly, foster an 'attitude of gratitude' for the gift that is your life, and for everything there is in it. It may not be perfect, but it is yours -- and now is the time to live it.

Friday, July 25, 2014

How To Motivate Your Kids To Learn Good Stuff

We want to aid our children in each way achievable, and this is a organic quality that's built into us from the moment we become parents. 


Expanding our childrens mind requires a lot of assistance and it really is fantastic whenever we can aid them in their endeavours. There comes a point although, when a line is crossed that leads into the territory of too much aid.  


Part of children transforming into responsible adults needs us to allow them to learn how to do particular things on their own. They might make some mistakes, but they need to grow and learn to grow to be more objective. How can we as mothers and fathers, stop being a crutch to our children and start permitting them do things on their own? 



Remember Your own Childhood  


Think back to whenever you had been young. Did you prefer to do issues on your own, or to have a person coddling you and doing every little thing for you? It is very doubtful that you simply favored the coddling. Even though children do not often want to do every thing they may be by themselves, they get satisfaction in possessing jobs and doing their very best. It provides self-confidence and self-respect when a child can look at the things they have completed and understand that they did it on their own.  


Be patient and Let Go of Perfection  


If we resist continually sweeping in and saving the day for our children, we must also learn to be patient with them.  We can certainly count on them to do their very best, and we as parents need to keep an open mind of our expectations of our children. 

This might mean enabling your baby to learn to use their very own utensils rather than feeding them in order to avoid them making a mess. It may mean letting your toddler take their clothes from the washer to the dryer, piece by piece, at a snail's pace. It could also mean watching your son or daughter battle at their math homework instead of leaping in and doing it for them. Raising children takes endurance and have confidence in their ability to learn. 



Educate Them the Appropriate Way  


Allowing your child to do things on his (or her) very own doesn't automatically imply that you simply stand back uninvolved. It's important to train your children the proper way to do their chores and be successful at jobs. This will provide them with the confidence they can really accomplish whatever they try. Providing them the equipment to be successful is a important step of maturity for them. It will also offer you the self-assurance in them which you want in order to step back and stop interfering.  



Inspire Them  


Every child needs encouragement, and every parent wants the chance to motivate. While your son or daughter is learning to grow to be more impartial, offer them sincere praise and compliment their attempts. This really will allow them to know you are there for them, even when you are not directly there. 

As our children grow, we learn to change our hands-on assistance with other ways to be there for them. It's important for us not to do every little thing for our children, but to permit them to learn things on their own. Finding ways to inspire them without having to do all their work will reward us and our children in the future, and develop the partnership between us and our children.

Sunday, May 11, 2014

Personal Development Tips That Will Improve Your Life

Growing to become the best person that you can be is really what personal development is all about. The best way to be successful is with your persona; growth is to learn as much information as you can and to apply that information whenever possible. 


Place your personal central principles into practice. Each person has his or her center of beliefs. Use your faith in these principles to drive your faith in yourself. If you do this you will encourage you to be consistent, it is an great trait to have.

When considering your own personal development, focus on leadership. Leadership has many different definitions, but the common theme is influence. 



Evaluate your leadership skills honestly. 
  1. What experiences have had the greatest impact on your life? 
  2. What kind of skills have you acquired? 
  3. What skills would you contribute to a group? 
Analyzing these questions can help you generate a team perspective and allow you to lead by example. If you hope to advance your state of knowledge regarding personal development, it can help to show a little humility. When you realize how insignificant you really are, you will begin to understand you have more to learn.




Once this concept is ingrained in your brain, you will be eager to learn new skills and expand your knowledge in order to improve yourself.

You should stay in great physical condition in order to get the best out of personal development.





Simple things such as getting plenty of quality sleep, eating a nutritious diet and exercising regularly will keep your energy levels up and give you a better chance of reaching the personal development goals you have set for yourself. While it appears easy and simple, getting in shape can also be very challenging. 




Create a written pep talk for yourself. On a postcard, write down all of your best qualities. Keep it handy, and when you need a little motivation, read it. For even more powerful results, record a video of yourself reading your list and watch it frequently. Sounds intriguing, right?

Instead of bragging about achievements, you should ask others about theirs.  





Respectfully listening to the successes of others can help you to gain insight into your own inner life as well as allowing you to connect with others in a meaningful way.

Whereas trying to fix your problems yourself is always a great idea, sometimes you might have to seek out professional help.





Self help books are useful to an extent, but they lack the substance or personal touch that a therapist can provide to a patient. There are many times when talking with another person about a stressful situation is the most effective route to relaxation. Reading a book won't let you have a dialog the way therapists do.

You may find it helpful to discuss your issues with a counselor or other trusted professional, such as your pastor. They have a great deal of experience in dealing with personal thoughts and are even licensed to do so. These impartial listeners can provide a sympathetic ear or help you deal with troublesome areas of your life. 





Getting your problems out in the open with a professional should give you a much healthier outlook on your own life.

If you use these tips in this article, you can begin your journey to personal development. Keep current with new information to keep adding to your strategies towards personal development.

Tuesday, April 29, 2014

Use These 4 Tips To Increase Your Self Esteem

Most people need a little self-esteem boost every once in a while. 

Self-esteem is all about how we feel inside. 


When our self esteem is low, we can find ourselves living with anxiety, we can find ourselves in abusive relationships, and be prevented from reaching our true potential.  



There may also be cons to self-esteem. For instance, when a person's sense of self worth is unrealistically high, it can turn into arrogance or what is known as 'narcissism', and this can cause problems. 



Such individuals can find it difficult to accept and learn from their own mistakes and may develop a false sense of entitlement. 

Developing a healthy level of self-esteem is very important. For some people, a healthy, high self-esteem comes naturally. But for others, developing a healthy self-esteem takes more effort. 



Check out these pointers to give your self-esteem a kick start. 



1. Draw up a list of your best points - For some individuals with diminished self-esteem, even considering making a list of their good qualities seems like a gigantic task, but it can be extremely helpful for boosting self-esteem. If you find this task challenging, consider what others say about you. What compliments have you ever been given? Start with those and then work from there. Jot your good qualities down using "I" and the present tense. For example, "I am a thoughtful and considerate person." 



2. Regular affirmations - Take another look at the list you made. Choose your favorite qualities to use to do daily affirmations. Take those statements and write them down on note cards and sticky notes. Put the sticky notes where you will notice them everyday, such as on your computer monitor, bathroom mirror, or refrigerator. When you see them, take a few moments to repeat them over to yourself. Put note cards in your pocket or wallet where you are sure to come across them at least once a day. When you do, take a moment to read them to yourself a few times. In just a little while you can change out some of your best qualities for some of the other qualities on your list. 



3. Gain some perspective - People often don't talk about their challenges, disappointments, and struggles in life, but that's not because they don't have them. How we decide to tackle these things will directly influence levels of self-esteem, joy and success. The really successful and confident people in life aren't those who have encountered few difficulties and challenges, they are people who have viewed them as just a part of life and have pushed ahead anyway, learning as they go. Your failures don't mean that you are a failure, they just mean you need to reassess the situation and the way you approach it and tackle it from a different angle. 



4. Make yourself the priority - Part of boosting your self esteem is accepting you are deserving of your own love. Make time for yourself. Take care of yourself when you're encountering a trying time. Say 'no' when you have to and don't feel bad about it. Make your needs clear to others and ask for what you need. (If you find it difficult to say 'no', then look for some assertiveness training, or check out a book on the subject.)

Use these 4 simple tips and you will increase your self-esteem. Above all, make sure you are kind to yourself and give yourself just as much love as you give to the important people in your life. You truly do deserve it!

Saturday, April 26, 2014

Single Moms Being Judged

When someone says in a condescending tone to you, "I never did that, and I raised three kids," or "Well it worked for me when I had young kid," do you ever feel like they are talking down to you? That maybe they don't think you are doing a good job or that you're not a good enough mom? You aren't alone. Many single moms feel the exact same way, but it's simply not true. You are better than a good enough mom. You are a great mom. Just because you don't do things the way someone else thinks you should is not a reflection of you; it's a reflection of them. Yes it might have worked for them, but that doesn't mean it's going to work for you or that you choose to parent that way. You know what's best for you, your kids, and your life.

We've all had someone tell us how we should raise our kids. We should do this or we should do that, because it worked thirty years ago or even ten years ago. It's great that everything turned out wonderful for them, but they weren't a single mom, working a full time job, doing it alone, and with no support or help. More than that, it's really about the tone they use. It's great to get help and advice except when someone is being condescending to you or thinking her way is better.

When you are around other women who talk to you this way, it starts to beat you down and down. It can't help but tear you up, and eventually you will be so tattered and worn that it will take every ounce of you to get back up. You second guess yourself and your decisions, which is already easy to do as a single mom since you don't have someone to bounce your ideas off of. You wonder if you're doing it right, wrong, or even know how to do it. You begin to question every decision you make. Then you feel helpless, worthless, and hopeless as though you can't do anything right, so what's the point in doing anything at all.

When you let other people talk to you this way, they will continue to do so. People talk to you the way you allow them to. When someones tone isn't pleasant, your gut reaction is to be defensive. That only antagonizes the other person usually ending up in a fight.

So when someone says something like this to you, in a friendly tone you can reply, "Thank you for that. I'm so glad it worked for you." Don't get into a long discussion about how you don't agree with it or converse how their method is out of date.

When family members say snide comments, it's best, no matter how hard it is, to let it go. They may think their way is best, and that's fine. You aren't here to prove them wrong. You are here to raise responsible, dependable, trustworthy, loving, and kind children. So no matter the words or tone someone else uses, believe in yourself to know what's best for your kids, and you're doing your best to ensure they have it.

Tuesday, April 15, 2014

Five Steps To An Easier Life


We are meant to live on this planet with ease and grace. Funny, it doesn't seem that ease happens too often, does it?  Now, 'grace' is the generosity of God that brings us extra goodies whether we deserve them or not. Ease, on the other hand, is something we can bring in for ourselves, mainly by eliminating stress. Who wouldn't want an easier life? I'm sure I do!  Here are five concrete steps you can take towards creating more ease in your life:  


 1. Drink lots of water, preferably R.O. (reversed osmosis) water with liquid minerals added. Your body is made up of water and minerals. In order to process effectively, your cells need lots of water! However, R.O. water has no minerals, so you need to top up your mineral content to support your cells and systems.  

 2. Eat as little sugar (or sweets in general) as possible, and no artificial sugars at all. Sweets mess with your hormone system, blocking your pancreas and thyroid, and triggering the 'fight or flight' response of your adrenals. Release of adrenaline and cortisol automatically puts on weight and makes you exhausted.  

 3. Watch your focus. Whatever you focus on, consciously or unconsciously, that will expand in your life. Worried about paying your bills? The universe says Yes to that, and you get more worries. Afraid of loneliness? The universe says Yes to that as well, and attracts more situations that make you lonely. On the other hand, if you are focused on gratitude, blessings, happiness and abundance, the universe says Yes to those as well. The universe always says Yes, so what is your question?  

 4. Make sure you're YOU at all times! Have you ever found yourself doing or saying something that is just not 'you'? Well, you probably have contamination's from other people that are just not compatible with your inner bio-computers. It's like trying to run a Mac program in a PC computer. Identify and throw them out!  

 5. Live in the Now, rather than the past or future. Now is the only time you can make choices, listen or talk to God, or appreciate your blessings. When you find yourself wandering - and you will - observe the perturbation as if it were a cloud passing by. Worry, fear, pain; oops, there it goes again!  

Now, that all seems pretty straightforward, doesn't it? Drink more water, eat little or no sweets, watch your focus, make sure you're you, and live in the Now. Oh, and decide how great a life you would like, and what that means to you. For some people, a great life is about money or love or family or service or spiritual development What's important to you? Find out the essence of your great life and focus on that!  

The key to finding out what you are here to do is PASSION! (Yes, there is an article about Passion, too.) It's ironic that finding and living your passion depends on a certain level of ease, but there it is. Once you have an easier life, your passion and purpose will naturally bubble up. So make it easier on yourself!

11 Personal Finance Steps for Those Pushing 40

By the time the average person reaches the age of 40, there have been significant milestones reached.


Most are homeowners, have a career, married and had their children. At this point, they are definitely thinking about the future decades in life. 



To be more specific, personal finances.

Emergency fund - If there isn't one already set up, now is the time to make it happen. Without money set aside for unexpected costs, people turn to credit cards or worse yet, payday loans. Going into the second phase of your life with pile of debt or bad credit isn't going to help. Get that emergency fund built so you don't have to depend on third party money.

Insurance - No more putting this one off. Life, disability, and even rental will save you and your family if something really bad happens. 



Shop for the best premiums that will cover all of your needs. 


Retirement accounts - Make the deposits automatic through your paycheck. You will never miss the money nor forget to pay. Too often we save these kinds of payments for anything that is left at the end of the month. It's time to make this payment first on the list. 



Financial Adviser - You may be doing a great job managing your money, but it would be best to sit with a professional and let them look at things. Even a few small tweaks to your plan may make all the difference for your future. 


Check your credit - Make an effort at least once a year to check your credit history. You may need to correct errors, dispute debt that doesn't belong to you or request to remove an outdated negative report. With a free credit check from each of the credit bureaus every 12 months, there is no excuse not to. 



Increase your tax knowledge - Become proficient on income tax. You may save money if you familiarize yourself with all the deductions and credits available to you. Hundreds or even thousands of dollars over the rest of your life add up. 



Invest in a home - If you haven't done so already, it's a good investment for your future. It doesn't fit everyone situation, but if you can, you will provide stability for your family. 



Maximize employment benefits - Does your employer offer to match retirement contributions? What are you waiting for? Other benefits you may be entitled to are; pretax transportation, tuition reimbursement, employee assistance, wellness programs, financial planning and health savings. Your employer may even offer something different. Unless you ask, you may be missing out. 



Make a will - This should have been done in your thirties so get to it. Especially if you have children who are still minors, it is important to spend the time and money and hire an attorney to create a solid estate plan. 



Learn investing basics - You want to make the best choices for your money. The more you know, the smarter those choices will be. Take a personal finance course in your community college to help get you started. 




Pay off your debt - Debt cripples finances. You will limit future plans by carrying past debt. Make a point to steadily payoff that debt and rebuild your credit. You will have more money to invest once it is gone.